How to Report Clergy Abuse

How To Report Sexual Abuse

By: Samuel Rogatinsky, Esq.

 

It happened to you. You never thought you would be in this situation but somehow you were convinced or you were forced or you really don’t know how it happened. The first thing to tell yourself is – ITS NOT YOUR FAULT.

Sexual Abuse is an epidemic in this country and it happens to more people than you could imagine. ANYONE can be a victim of sexual assault: women or men, children or adults, straight or gay people. In the U.S., a sexual assault occurs every 2 minutes.  1 in 6 women and 1 in 33 men will be victims of sexual assault in their lifetime. Clearly, sexual assault is a problem that should be taken very seriously.

If you are a victim of sexual abuse, you need to get help sooner than later. The longer you wait the worse it will be for you in the long run. I know that you are confused and afraid. What will your parents or friends say when they hear about it?

I know the feelings that are going through your head because it is my fulltime job is to help people who have been sexually abused by teachers, pastors, rabbis, coaches, counselors, doctors and yes, even by their parents.

I know you are confused and scared to death and you are not sure if you can tell anyone but you have to pull yourself together and do the right thing. Here is what you need to do if you have been sexually abused.

How to Report Sexual Abuse by a Friend of the Family

  1. If you have been sexually abused by a friend of the family you must speak to your parents right away. If you think that your parents will not believe you then you must approach a counseling professional in your school. Every public school or private school employs either a social worker or psychologist who is there to help students with all sorts of issues. At the very least there will be a school nurse that can help you get to the right person. Whomever you speak to at the school will believe you and they will help you speak to your parents. When you go, as hard as it is for you to get it out, try to write down exactly what happened. I mean write when it happened, how it happened and who sexually abused you. If you remember the day, place it happened, time of day, or the frequency of the abuse, write it down. This will help the psychologist understand the magnitude of the situation. People want details and if you end up going to the police that day, it will help them do their job. If you are having a hard time talking to someone at the school and you need someone to speak to who has heard this many times before, call me on my personal cell phone and I will help you. My number is 954.444.4032.

How to Report Clergy Abuse

  1. If you have been sexually abused by a pastor, priest, clergy member or a rabbi you must speak to your parents right away. If your parents are very close to the pastor or rabbi, you will need to tell someone else. Besides the psychologist in your school, you need to tell your best friend about what happened and when it happened. I know that it is embarrassing but you have to realize that sexual abusers will usually deny what they did and having another person know about it will help stop the abuser in the future. After you tell your parent and best friend, you will need to contact the police. Again, when you get the courage to report the abuser, it is always best to have the information written down in your own words. The more details you have, the easier it will be for the police to get involved in a meaningful way.  I have been involved in situations where a child has told his parent and the parent would not believe the child no matter what they say. I know this can be very confusing to you and you are going to feel like nobody out there cares or can help you. I have heard this problem many times before and I will help you speak to your parent if you are not able to do it. You can call me on my personal cell phone number at 954.444.4032. If I don’t answer, leave a message and I will always call you back.

How to Report Sexual Abuse by a Parent or Relative

  1. If you were sexually abused by a parent or a family member you will need to speak to the police about the problem. As sad as it sounds, this has happened to many other people and you are not the first one to go through this. I know you are scared and lonely and you feel as if there is no one to turn to but let me tell you that there are people out there that understand your pain and fear. Some of you reading this article have justified what has happened and you have a hard time telling the police that your parent has been sexually abusing you. Understand that this is not your fault and it’s not normal for your parent to be sexually abusing you. It is wrong and it is illegal and it must be stopped right away. If you are afraid to go to the police on your own, you can contact me on my personal cell phone number at 954.444.4032 and I will help you. Every city has a child welfare department and I will help you to get in touch with the people who are in place in your city to help you with these types of emergencies. Do not for one minute think that it’s ok to allow this to happen and don’t think for one minute that you can’t survive reporting this terrible crime to the police.

How to Report Sexual Abuse by a Teacher, Couch or Camp Counselor

  1. If you were sexually abused by a teacher or a coach or a counselor in a camp they must be reported and stopped. You will need to tell your parents even if you feel embarrassed because if this person is doing it to you, he/she is probably doing it to other children as well. Sexual predators who abuse children never do it only once and they almost always have multiple victims. You are a survivor and survivors do not just sit around and do nothing. Sexual abuse survivors overcome obstacles and the way you will heal yourself is to fight back and show the abuser that you are not afraid. As I have stressed in this article, you need to write down everything about the abuse. When it happened, where it happened, who did it to you and what time it happened.  These are all things that anyone who is in a position to help you will need to know. Don’t assume that this information will just find its way to the right people. Things don’t happen on their own and if you don’t show law enforcement that you have been abused and you want justice, they will never react the way you expect them to react. You must be proactive in your effort to stop the abuse and you must show people around you that you are strong and you are serious about stopping the sexual deviant that abused you. If you are having trouble getting to the right person in your city or state, feel free to call me on my personal cell phone number at 954.444.4032.  I have been helping people who need it the most since 1994 and I am here to help you get out from a bad situation. We both know that it won’t be an easy road but we also know that you can’t let it continue no matter what might happen when you report it to the authorities.

Sexual abuse is an epidemic in this country and people need a guide to help them stop the sexual or clergy abuse. If this is happening to you, follow the instructions in this article by reaching out to people who are there to help you. If you find that you are getting nowhere, don’t be afraid to call me for free. I believe you and I know that it is happening to you. I want to help you. I want to help you heal on this very rough journey. I also want you to know that you can recover from this. As bad as it is, you can come out from this problem. Things may not always be the same after you report the sexual abuse but you will save your life and you life is worth saving. Report sexual abuse today.

 

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